No, I don’t mind here without you,
Long gone is the phase of depression dissatisfaction and stillness.
No more do I smell of alcohol and smokes all the time,
I go out for movies,
For walks in the park
And wherever life takes me along.
I click pictures of me nowadays,
I have re-opended my instagram and WordPress.
Quite happy I am knowing the fact
That I survived your migration from my life.
Life is better this way,
I have learnt so many truths
That used to mock me from behind,
And deeply lost in your love
I failed to look back and notice.
Anyway, now things are fine.
I don’t spend nights grieving you,
I don’t lock myself during the daylight.
I couldn’t let go of them.
I learnt to control my actions, reactions and decisions.
But every time I visit the places
We used to go together,
Or go out for dinners at your favourite restaurant,
I sneak for you.
I look around for a glimpse,
Though I don’t want to face you
Because I will have nothing to say.
Even today I check the list of people online,
To read your name.
I wait for you to see my posts,
And I don’t want to confess the rock-hard truth,
But I guess I am still standing on the threshold
Smelling of alcohol and smokes…
Only with fresh clothes, make up and perfume this time.
Does it alter my miserable distorted shape?
Maybe for the World it might be a yes,
But life for me is still the same-
Downhearted and insubstantial.